Is it Him or Me? - Dating an Insecure Men

About a month or two ago, I went on a date with a young, good looking, tall and dark man.  He had a nice body and better yet he had excellent conversation.  We could talk about books, traveling, politics and even religion.  So I thought to myself, what a catch - I may have lucked up on this one.  Until he casually touched my arm and said, “Wow, you are soft”.  I looked into his big brown eyes and told him “All the boys tell me that” with a slight giggle.  He replied “But your skin is not as soft as mine.” - WTF were my initial thoughts.  However, I let it slide because I am not in the business of comparing myself to everything and everyone else.  The date ended without incident and we decided to meet again. 

During the second date we talked in depth about our future plans.  He went into great detail about all the important politicians and famous people he meets for his job.  “My career keeps me super busy and I travel a lot with my job.  So I really do not have time to date. You should consider yourself a lucky girl.”  I wondered what was happening and was he serious.  I smiled at him and replied, “O, yeah, I remember those days when I worked for someone else.  I traveled across the country for, the man, but, now, I work for myself.  So I make time for what I want.”  I left the date feeling exhausted.  During my drive home I debated if it was him or me.  Our initial flirtatious banter turned into him underhandedly picking me a part.  

I came to the conclusion that he was superficial and most importantly, he was insecure.  I realized he was not proving to me, how great of a guy he was, but instead he was proving it to himself.  I decided to let that fish go.  I figure if he was mine, he would come back and if not, it was never meant to be in the first place.  I did not lose anything.  

Self-conscious people use their possessions and their abilities to belittle others to mask, who they are deep down inside.  They are experts at manipulating situations to make other people feel doubtful.  The best weapon against them is to be completely genuine and positive.  Do not talk about materialistic matters instead talk about feelings.  This shows them that they can be vulnerable with people without getting hurt.  More importantly, it forces them to recognize that they can relate to people on a deeper level, beyond what a person can see.  

At the end of the day, I had to leave him alone.  He had deep-seated issues.  I get paid to help people get in touch with their inner-self. I decided he could have me as a friend or a therapist, but not as both.  So I moved on.  Do you need help deciding and understanding the qualities you want in a mate contact Cupid’s Planner.  We specialize in the empowerment and sexual freedom of women.  Also do not forget to like us on Facebook or Instagram


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