Should You be Friends with Your Ex?

In the process of finding Mr. Right, we will often encounter Mr. Lazy, Mr. Liar, Mr. Nice Guy, Mr. Dreamer, Mr. Player and Mr. Kingdom-cum.  When exiting these relationships, the question may arise should we remain friends.  Now, before divulging more into this topic, I must say that I truly believe that men and women can be friends; however, it has to be mutually understood! It has to be understood that it is and will only be a friendship.

Before deciding whether or not to remain friends with your Ex, you should consider how do you handle break-ups.  If it would hurt you to hear about your Ex’s new girlfriend or you cannot imagine taking a backseat in his life then - No, you should not try to remain friends.  Why force yourself to suffer.  Give yourself time to mourn the relationship.  Once you feel strong enough, then you can reconnect.  You have to be honest with yourself.

On the other hand, if you were not deeply in love and it would not bother you to hear about his new affairs, then by all means be friends.  However, just remember the qualities that you want in a friendship.  If your Ex lied, cheated and manipulated you, then why surround yourself with such negativity?  However, if he was genuinely a kind person and it  just did not work out then yes be friends.

At the end of the day one has to do what they are comfortable with.  This could be disconnecting all ties; it could mean taking time to mourn the loss of your relationship and then reconnecting; it could also mean downgrading him from a boyfriend to a mid-night booty call, or it could mean going directly into a mutually agreed  upon friendship with defined emotional boundaries.  It is all up to the people involved but we have to be real.  Although I think Exs can be friends, I have yet to experience a friendship successfully with an Ex.  In my experience it does not work out. Either my Ex did not possess the qualities to be a friend or a boyfriend from the beginning; or someone wants more than the other.  So I ended up doing  what was best for me -moving on.  I hope that one day I can have a relationship like my grandparents.  They remained friends after a divorce and being remarried to another person.  

Overall there is no right or wrong way to break-up, but whatever you do, you should choose to do what is healthiest for you.  If you need help understanding your relationships contact Cupid’s Planner.  We specialize in the empowerment and sexual freedom of women.  Also do not forget to like us on Facebook and to follow us on Twitter.